Give me hate, I’m used to it

Give me hate, I’m used to it all my life, that I can handle. But please don’t give me kindness, for it’s unbearable, I know not how to reciprocate.  Heavy is my guilt to receive such grace, when so many innocent lives depart this earth without an ounce of it.  Let my tears enter the ground before my body does. It’s clear to have come without knowing and to leave without knowing that settles the ego. But in between I hope to have tried with conviction to surrender to you unknown. I realize now, nothing I ask matters, nothing I give matters and eternally grateful for everything that was given.  A fools peril is life and death its preordained destiny. This fool welcomes all as he welcomes you. APTTU.